I’ve heard said that when you have a near death experience,
You see your whole life flash by in a second…
Well, they were wrong. Or maybe it wasn’t near enough…,
The one I had yesterday
When a huge SUV almost crushed my tiny beetle.
My fault… but I swear I didn’t see it coming.
I swear I checked for oncoming traffic.
But then I was in a pretty foul mood
And that probably caused a blind spot.
He/she braked and I swerved
He probably yelled at me.
I don’t know… but this I know,
Someone definitely is watching over me.
My dad or god or my dad as god.
Nothing flashed by me
No elation, no disappointment
No laughter, no tear
No triumph, no failure
Not one special moment from 38 years of life
No suppressed longing no repressed regret
No unbridled joy
Neither were there subconscious memories
All I thought was, “How stupid could I have been!”
“I put my kids in danger! How could I?”
All I heard was rebuke, “How could I be careless
With my kids in the car!”
Chastised, I pulled over for a breather
My daughter, the elder one who realized what just occurred
Hugged me in an effort to cheer
The other one, unaware, carried on demanding what she was demanding…
Life went on, as I drove to their next class
But it was quite a while before my hands stopped trembling.